Jake-Morrison.com

Once again, I’m late. There is no good excuse this time, no “Oh, we haven’t had Internet or power for the last day or two.” There is nothing so convenient available for me to point a finger at. The pure and simple fact of the matter is that I am completely at a loss on what to write about. I’ve taken more time than usual to try and find something to write about. Sadly, this did not spark any nascent creativity in me. I just feel… empty. Like there is an empty void of darkness where my inspiration and heart should be, a dark dank hole with a single 75-watt spotlight shining down on it.

That is what I see, right now, when I close my eyes. I see an empty cavernous cylindrical space, the walls black and slightly ribbed vertically. It is kind of like an enormous quasi-organic metal trashcan. You know the type, the kind that Oscar the Grouch lives in. Except, from my vantage point, you cannot see the top or bottom. In fact, it’s a seemingly endless space. A spiffy platform floats in the middle of the space, which is a strangely high-tech accoutrement for such a decidedly Spartan space. That single 75-watt spotlight shines from the mysteriously shrouded heights upon this platform. The air itself feels thick, warm, and stagnant, like the fetid breath of some horrible space monster. The entire space feels dark, scary, but somehow significant. This space was created for something, to showcase some unbelievable horror or unimaginable treasure.

By this point, dear reader, I am sure you are wondering what is on that platform. You no doubt wonder what it is that mysteriously shrouded light illuminates. For surely, all this construction, all this build up, had to be for something. I hate to break it to you, kiddo, but there is nothing on that platform. It’s the stark and shocking kind of nothing that you find inside a hermetically sealed room. The kind of nothing you see when you look at the Star Trek-style science fiction shows; the brilliantly lit and white corridors, not a spot, not a speck, not even a bit of pile of the carpet out of form. But in this expansive and dark space, with all the dirt and dank and oppressive atmosphere surrounding it, it doesn’t feel clean at all. In fact, it feels rather unfinished. Like someone began to create something, but then reached the platform, threw his hands in the air, and said, “For fuck’s sake, I’m out.”

I fear that is me. I am that mysterious creator, the person who, near the cusp of finality, of closure, of worth, gave up. I find myself jaded, cynical, and darker than I used to be. I worry too much. I complain too much. I just… I don’t know how to make it stop. Or how to turn it around, to make things better for me. I have been making steps and strides with that. I’ve been doing my best to be sociable, fun, and to keep from meddling in the lives and actions of others. Even so, sometimes I feel that I have run out of the light and laughter in my heart. I think that is the worst bit. That tight little worry and fear that I am losing my touch. That tiny little fear that I am no longer amusing. It grabs and seizes me in my darker moments, and convinces me that I am falling out of touch with reality.

I don’t know what is up with this last week. I know I kvetch and whine about not having a muse, and not having ideas… but this week is the most arid and desolate period I’ve had yet. It’s kind of like the difference between the desert of the Antarctic and the desert of the Atacama. Sure, the Antarctic is a desert, with a shortage of precipitation… but I think you’ll find the Atacama is far more arid. And it is far, far less hospitable. What I’ve felt the last couple of days defies explanation. It is not pleasant. It is not happy. But I think it’s just a lame and stupid phase.

At the end of this, I suppose that I have news of a sort to update you with.

As for my “Life-Affirming Commitments” that I started up in the very first blog post, I feel I am doing quiet well. Commitments Numbers One, Two, and Six are definitely done and completed. I am trying to work on Commitments Numbers Three, Four, and Five this week. Commitments Numbers Seven and Eight are always on the docket, but never quite seem to get solved. To be honest, those two worry me the most. Those are the two that I want to have completed the most; and by all logic and luck, they seem to be the ones that will take the longest to solve. And Commitment Number Nine is getting close to the time of action. If you want to help me with any or all of the unfinished Commitments, I will accept any and all help.

This is the last week the full edition of my blog will be seen on Facebook and MySpace. After this week, you will see a short excerpt and a hyperlink. That will be the format for the blog for the indefinite future. I feel that this is the right move for me. I want to drive traffic to my site. That will be the home of me.

Next week, I plan to continue the “A Man Down” story. That is right, I will continue the story every third week. That seems to be the best choice. If it is super-popular and awesome, I may bump it up to every other week.

It is now time for me to shamelessly whore myself to you. I want you to comment on my web site. I want your hate, your love, your thoughts, and your instincts. A lot of time, energy and thought went into [http://www.jake-morrison.com]; and I really do want it to evolve into a community of confidants, a collaboration of colleagues, a fellowship of friends. I want it to be all of these, and more. So help make my dream come true. Comment on my site. Befriend me of Facebook. And follow me as @Chiron7936 on Twitter. If you do these things, I will love you forever. Or at least until someone else does them, whichever comes first.

Today was quite the strange day. Saturday was so tumultuous; such a day full of things and people and experiences… by comparison, today was a bit drab and colorless. Sometimes, the drab and colorless is just what you need. For you see, I am operating on a little under four hours of sleep. But I’m okay with that.

You see, my dear reader, Saturday was my birthday. A truly frabjous day it was as well. I don’t know how well you know me. In any case, one of your purposes in coming here, besides the free entertainment and my not-so-subtle threats against you if you don’t, is that you want to get to know me better. I am not a party person. Seriously. I’m more of a small groups kind of person; I’m at my happiest with a handful of close friends. I feel more at home there. I feel I shine far brighter. So my birthday began in one of the most perfect ways possible; I awoke in the early afternoon. There was nothing to do, no pressures on me. I logged onto the Internet and was greeted by a smattering of warm wishes on my Facebook wall. I then spent most of the day playing Spore, because I could.

Later in evening, as the Sweesh species achieved sentience and began to unify their home planet of Caprica under one World Government, my roommate and Kitten arrived. And their arms were laden with lasagna ingredients. One of the easiest ways to please me is to make me food. Hell, you just have to give me food. You don’t really need to make me it. Just deliver. And so, with the delectable promise of homemade lasagna in the air, Jason and I left the house to catch a showing of Fanboys.

I had been waiting for that movie for nigh on three years as of yesterday. Needless to say, I was eagerly anticipating the visual delight that I was hoping to receive. We barely made it to the theater in time, thanks to the criminal lack of parking, and comically inefficient queue line for tickets. The movie started just as we sat down. From that moment, I was hooked. The first thing on screen was a crawl; and that crawl started with ‘Episode VII’. Win. The movie was pretty hilarious; in fact, coming out of the theater at 9:15, I would have gladly turned around and gone to the 10:00 showing. The movie was an hour and a half of solid Star Wars references and jokes. In fact, I’d say that without being a fanboy of the Star Wars films, Fanboys wouldn’t be nearly as good. That is why this movie was amazing; it was fan service, pure and simple. I loved it. It is, for me, a must buy.

As Jason and I sped home, we fired salvo after salvo of lines back and forth. The staccato fusillade of one liners and quotes continued until we arrived home, where we found a small bevy of comrades awaiting our… nay, my, arrival. So began a fun night. Jason, James, Kitten, Jenny, Jen, and I hung out whilst Jason cooked. And in short order, Mandy, Tony, Mike, and Rachel showed up. It was quite a bit of fun. There was Cranium to be had, and while Team Mandy and Jake did not win, it was damn close. It all came down to Tony having to act out a blowjob. As all good parties do, I think. Then there was drinking games and revelry until the wee hours of the morning.

All in all, it was quite the entertaining birthday. To everyone who came and surprised me, and to each and every one of you who left me a message, wrote on my wall, or twitted a Happy Birthday to me, thank you. Thank you indeed.

The other big news from yesterday was the fulfillment of one of my “life-affirming commitments” from my very first blog post this year. Commitment Number Two has been achieved. I finally went live with my website, as a birthday present to myself. You can check it out at [http://www.jake-morrison.com]. I finally made the decision to scrap my homebrew blogging engine; it was simple and easy to use, sure… but writing a custom logging and commenting system was sucking up my time. So I turned to a little thing you may have heard of, a certain framework that has fast become the industry standard. WordPress. Why should I reinvent the wheel? It is good enough for a lot of major names in the web industry, for certain then; it is good enough for me. What you see there is the 0.8 version of the website; this week I plan on arranging and bringing online more of my artwork. I will also be streamlining the code that runs it; over the next week, the site will become leaner and meaner. Once that is done, and a good stable of artwork has been uploaded, and once I’ve updated the ‘About’ section of it to my satisfaction, it will enter 1.0 status. Like all good websites, the site will never be finished. But right now it is in a fragile evolutionary state. So use it, abuse it. Find flaws. Tell me about them. Now is the time to fix them. Think of this like being in the Beta for Jake’s site.

The coolest thing about this site is it will be the home of my blog. That has been my plan from the beginning. There will be a transitional period, however. Right now the blog is posted as a note on Facebook, and a blog on MySpace. For the next two weeks, it will be posted on my website as well. After next week, MySpace and Facebook will see short excerpts of my blog, followed with a hyperlink to my site. I’ll keep that up for as long as I feel is necessary. That could be ‘forever’, or it could be a month. Who knows? Not I. But I am excited at the prospect of moving to my new home.

Also, I would like to speak to last week’s exercise in creative writing. I like to think of it as a success. I enjoyed myself, and judging from the comments, dear reader, you did as well. So I think I will continue the story, serializing it and adding to it every other week. I haven’t decided on the frequency yet; it very well may be a once a month feature. What are your thoughts? Do you want to read more? How often do you want to read it?

So once again we find ourselves at the tail end of the blogging experience. In a shocking and new twist, I humbly ask that you comment on this blog. I desire your ire, your love, your anger, and your glee. But this time, I urge you to make your comments on my website. I want to make the full move to using that site as my exclusive blogging home. And only you can help me do that. I need your help. Ideally, I want a community to form. I want you to comment on my blog, to comment on the comments of others, and so on, and so forth. This will create a primordial ooze of ideas and criticism, a place of heady inspiration and wonder. So, as always, friend me on Facebook, follow me on Twitter @Chiron7936, and now, bookmark my website.

Welcome to the launch of Jake-Morrison.com! This website will be home to the rambling writing, amazing artwork, and crazy chicanery that Jake Morrison comes up with.
I find it fitting that this site goes live on my birthday. This is my present to myself, and to you! Every Monday will feature an update of the blog. Keep up with the day-to-day by following my Twitter feed. Make yourself at home, dear reader, and enjoy!